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Driving to a doctor's appointment for my son today, I listened a bit to talk radio. The story of the moment was that of the runaway bride in Georgia.

Long story short: she bought a bus ticket a week in advance of the wedding and used it to concoct a story of her abduction while she basically ran from her nuptials. Everyone in the town was looking for her and they were pretty hacked off to learn that she was not kidnapped, but instead had seriously cold feet. But at least she wasn't dead somewhere.

Other than wasting some people's time and burning through about $60,000 in search efforts for a lie (which in my opinion, she should pay back), this ordeal was victimless. No one was hurt by it.

I don't know the woman. She obviously did something very stupid. But do we take one act and then judge someone by it?

I've done some stupid things in my time (such as ride on top of a station wagon at 60 mph...), that if others were to look at me, they might question whether I were fit to do many things in life. I've had other moments that were equally ill-thought and plain dumb in retrospect.

The greatest thing about America is that we don't hold down people who fail. Instead, we cheer the underdog. We want people to succeed. It's okay to fail here. That separates us from other nations.

In a victimless act of stupidity, should society render a judgment that permanently harms the life of the perpetrator for the rest of their life? Should one act where no one got hurt become the basis of a character judgment?

I hope that we hesitate before we issue such a verdict. If it's a pattern, judgment might be fair. If there is someone who gets hurt by it, judgment should be expected.

But I think we all need the elbow room to be stupid once in a while. Even if it's nationally stupid.


by Brett Rogers, 5/3/2005 6:14:08 PM



I totally agree. Stupidity makes us who we are and who we are to become. If it wasn't for stupidity (also known as mistakes) we wouldn't be where we are in our lives. We would never grow as people.

I find it amazing, as always, when the media jumps on the bandwagon and just runs, runs, runs, with stories such as these. Leave the woman and the groom alone. Obviously it was very poor judgement. Let her have some breathing room.



Posted by Anonymous, 5/4/2005 1:08:11 PM

And, I have to say, I feel sort of sorry for this woman. I can't imagine being in the state of mind, or in a relationship, where the only way you feel you can get out of a wedding is to fake your own abduction.



Posted by Bella, 5/4/2005 3:53:10 PM

Stupidity makes us who we are... never thought of it that way, but that's right.

I feel sorry for her too, especially since she'll probably stay in the same town for at least a while. Hopefully sometime soon, people can have a good laugh about this and forgive her.

Her guy is standing by her... she must be worth it :)



Posted by Brett Rogers (, 5/4/2005 4:08:59 PM

Ah the things stress will make us do. This is a big high-society wedding and it sounds like the mom has been a bit overbearing. I feel sorry for her. And for the groom.

Kind of an aside to this, why are weddings such a big stressor? When I think of my first wedding, oh boy. Lots of pressure, only it was the groom's mom that kept getting in my face about how I was doing things all wrong...even on my wedding day.
My second wedding was simple, just close family and our kids and I have much fonder memories from it.

Anyway, I wish nothing but the best to this couple and hope they can work things out PRIVATELY.



Posted by Anonymous, 5/4/2005 11:21:43 PM

I suppose they're such a stresser because they're only supposed to happen once and on that day, the bride is a princess and the center of all attention.



Posted by Brett Rogers (, 5/4/2005 11:31:53 PM

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